Spelling, You Guys. She's a Ruthless Mistress.

Naval Gazing vs. Navel Gazing

• Look, Bobby! Look at the magnificent ships as they pass by in the bay!

• Look, Bobby; becoming a successful adult requires the subtle skill of criticizing yourself more harshly than any other being on the planet could hope to achieve. It's an exercise in self-hate, really. Try it a little each day until you've mastered it. 

-alternately-

• Look, Bobby! Study the lint in it's natural habitat--my belly button! Isn't it just fascinating?!